a post about website updates, and a roundup of video games i've been playing.

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this blog post is brought to you by god did you know adding pages to your website and making art sucks when you're sleepy all the goddamn time?

half kidding, half kidding. but it's been a while since my last blog post and outside of my guide to the fediverse, i have literally done fuck all lately because... oh my god, i've been TIRED.

the secret they don't tell you about running your own website: you can do it easily! but watch out. nobody is making cool site updates, or artistic content for your works page, or funny/interesting blog posts... but you. and when you're tired? when you're burning all your energy doing IRL work and surviving? that site plan list might take another 9 months.

so, let me talk a little bit about this website, having my own internet playground, and the veil behind the curtain. if you've read my about or artist statement, you may have gleaned some facts about me. such as the fact i have a cacophany of brain problems melding into the most unholy mental illness potion you've ever imagined.

that's part of the problem. my ADHD and other things* mean sometimes i just cannot focus on adding pages to my website, on making decently functioning code that works well, etc. it comes and goes in waves. the bigger problem is how my real life intersects with those things, and spoiler alert: it's not great.

i work ye olde retail in the Real World in an attempt to get out of my house, which is not a great place for me**, and. well. the combination of "grocery store worker" and "home life is a constant world of stress" with "my brain is a cauldron of lava making random pokemon glitch cries" is a bad recipe for looking at my website to-do list and feeling so exhausted that i just go make a bunch of silly posts on fediverse instead.

i haven't been able to start the next zine i want to (a zine about binding and other transmasc tips that i wish i had spelled out explicitly for me) because i've been exhausted. poetry? i can barely put coherent words on a screen right now. photography? maybe if my car wasn't running its check engine light now! new directories to split my guides and my shrines on the site? my god, i haven't even put away my laundry this week.

here's the thing: first and foremost, this site is supposed to be relaxing for me. (and also a place to share my art and other hobbies, and sometimes very generous people tip me money and it makes me emotional.) this site and the pages and features i want to add are like, level 30 of my priority list. so it's good i've been putting off working on it to try and recover 10% of my energy! but it also makes me kind of sad, you know? this is my blog alongside all of that. i like having a place to post longform rambles and funny comparison lists and such. but i haven't even had the energy to just talk for long periods of time; i just have been playing animal crossing and pokemon and ace attorney.

i see people update their websites so frequently, and i wonder if i'll ever get to that level, or if burnout will consume most of the longform content i want to make. but i am trying very hard to not measure myself by others' dev schedules. and i think i'm doing okay.

with all of that complaining out of the way, i'll at least provide something somewhat fun at the end of this post:

the games i've been playing for august!

animal crossing: new horizons -- been playing since launchday. recently, though, my fiance has chosen to complete his museum, and i've chosen to completely overhaul my house and get rid of the terrible memories from 2020. i've been enjoying remaking my house and island in my updated aesthetic tastes! god i miss club tortimer.
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pokemon violet -- shiny hunting to pass the time until the area zero DLC drops! my most recent shiny was iron jugulis. looking forwards to the teal mask immensely!
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story of seasons - a wonderful life -- this is my first proper SOS/harvest moon game; i've actually only played the rune factory games and stardew valley. it's adorable, a little outdated compared to rf4/rf5 and even sdv, but so deeply charming that i don't even mind having a very simple farming game to relax with. the genderswag is off the charts.
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slime rancher - plortable edition -- started my second ranch after a period away. it's.. there are so many phosphor hunters. you don't understand
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splatoon 3 -- another game i haven't put down since launchday, which is fitting, because i bought my switch for splatoon 2 after playing splatoon 1 as the Only Wii U Game I Possessed For A Year. gotta admit that the splatfests have been a major miss this game, though, which makes me sad; i do love big run with my Heart and Soul though and i shake my fist at the sky because i keep barely missing top 20% since the first time i got top 20%. very, very excited for the side: order DLC.
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phoenix wright: ace attorney -- this is, uh. my like. 6th full replay of this game. however this time it's part of the switch port of the HD trilogy! rise from the ashes remains a case that is incredible to go through and simultaniously the length of this case makes me want to start screaming in the middle of the courtroom. excited to replay justice for all again after this hell i've been put through. why don't you solve the goddamn vase puzzle, detective gumshoe?
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terraria -- this is my first time playing terraria. i know. i'm sorry. i was a minecraft kid and have been playing minecraft for literally 11 years okay? my fiance and his sister bought me the game to play with them and i've been extremely gleeful playing it. it makes me feel like a 12 year old discovering a jungle temple for the first time again. it also vaguely reminds me of don't starve? i know how to throw a boomerang and commit terrarian tax fraud.

well, hopefully that Video Game Roundup™ was entertaining! i may try and make a monthly Game Roundup if people like reading them. the saga of my war with certain ace attorney cases can be immortalized that way. here's to maybe finding that energy to start new directories and work on my to-do list, folks.

* - privacy, sorry.
** - Understatement Of The Year.

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